Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Found Text: On Body Image

  1. My hands are always cold.
  2. My eyes routinely switch between green and blue. I have photos to prove it as well.
  3. I'm slender and I have a curvy figure, that's weird for a guy right?
  4. I don't tan or burn. I can be out in the sun every day for six weeks without sunscreen and nothing will happen. I'm very pale.
  5. My wrist is less than 6 inches around.
  6. My toes face outward. And I'm a ginger.
  7. I can wiggle my ears. I also have a huge tongue and can lick my elbow.
  8. I have blood red patches of skin on parts of my body and a pitch-black part on my arm. The rest of my skin seems to remain tan, even without being in the sun.
  9. One of my toenails is extremely thick and hard to cut.
  10. My pinkies bend inward.
  11. I have the most feministic body a man can get.
  12. My arms feel almost no pain and what pain they do feel fades very quickly. The rest of me hurts just fine.
  13. I can put my hand behind my ribcage. It's not like I'm underfed, I just have a super high metabolism.
  14. I apparently have abnormally large nostrils. Or at least that’s what one of my friends keeps telling me.
  15. I produce a lot of salt crystals in my sweat, when it hardens in my pores it makes needle shapes. Thus every time I sweat I feel million tiny needles stabbing my skin. It's fucking annoying, especially since I'm the unlucky bastard to inherit that from my parents.
  16. My pancreas doesn't work anymore. Meaning I have Diabetes.
  17. I've got balls of steel.
  18. I also have a big, butterfly-shaped burnmark on my left palm that grows hair.

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